This is a Russian cut-out animation piece from the 1970s on the theme of war. It is dreamy and disjointed, and extraordinarily beautiful. Take this one on faith. It’s a visual treat with plenty of meaning but it doesn’t have to make perfect sense the first time you see it. I have my genius friend, Helen, to thank for this one.

Yuriy Norshteyn is most famous for Hedgehog in the Fog (1975).  The animation technique involves about a meter’s worth of stacked glass panes that slide around, creating movement and depth.

I always complain about the lack of potent contemporary writing, as if all the best writing was done a hundred years ago, and I am always so so so happy when someone proves me oh, so wrong.  Haven Veritas is a “Performance Poet, Freelance Writer, Professional Shenanigan-ista” and a facebook friend 🙂  Her “Hearts” Chapbook is available now and you should buy it!!

To order, send $12 via Paypal to info@havenveritas.com or cash/check/money order to:
Haven Veritas
PO Box 105
Warrensburg, MO 64093 

I am blown away by this piece of writing. Enjoy!

(The original formatting refuses to stick on here so to see it with the right spacing, go here.)

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

I drowned in your eyes exactly one week…
before I drowned between your thighs…

You’re every star speckled sunrise I hope to God/dess I live to see.

I’ve learned, love.

The faintest hum of freedom baking warm on a desert’s stretch; you sing in me.

I swear I spoke brown paper bag imagining your heart beat.

You’re the only I bow before in worship depositing sacred prayers through dripping lips while you cry out to your God with shaking exhalation. My name…

is not…

Jesus Christ.

But you smell like Heaven, if Heaven smells like amber drenched wishes and molten promise.

You’re compassion’s best side with a dark chocolate tongue and all I can do is dream of you melting in my mouth.

You’re my greatest comfort’s dirty little secret, so you don’t have to speak…

just moan for me and I’ll understand every word.

That whimper I just heard?

That sliding sound meant, “Blessed be all that is holy, who caused our parents to rock hips so that you could hide your words inside me like a secret.”

See? I’m fluent in you…

fluid over you…

rocking side to side, back to forth.

Palm to sweat slicked heart struggling its way into my hands. Throb for me.

My knee spreads your thighs, a subtle benediction.

My mouth on yours, sacred communion, while wrist deep I nail you to the bed.

Let me breathe stories of the places we’ll go and show you the beautiful world that lives in the back of your head. Show you the real meaning of a craving. I want you deep enough to save my soul; to rock you to sleep.

Feels like I should begin this once upon a time, a long, long time ago. I swear I’ve had you pulsing between my lips before. I’ve drawn your fingers into my mouth and tasted the last time I left earth. You shimmer so brightly through me. I’d live in your shadow as long as it had that same look in your eyes when we’re trading movement for hitched breath recalling our ancestors.

Do they rock with us, gripping rounded hips, tongues tracing palms for our lifelines? Did they know while preparing for their sleep that they would see chest pressing against back, flexed calf and curled toes? Laughter rumbling into nape? Pooling moisture glistening droplets of ecstasy greeting eager lover with open legs and grinning heart? Did anyone tell them that life…

is just a dream?

Your words fall smooth like the slick drip of warmth sauntering down to my ass. You taste like want from 1700 miles away and I’m shattered; a tattered work of art in need of a master painter who knows what faster means…

And more…

And…

NOW…

Tell me a story of the night mathematics shifted,

turning one…

plus one…

into one.

One creature shattering to rebuild …

one mind whose …

one coherent thought is…

HARDER

“Harder” 2009-2010, Haven Veritas. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of the copyright owner or the publisher.

Kristine Adams and I discovered this lovely poem together while on a road trip to LA.  We decided it would be a good one to read on the phone to our friends, but couldn’t get a hold of anyone to read it to as it was a Friday night and our friends apparently have lives.  So, here it is, in loving reproduction.

The Wild Cousin of Potpourri

In the lost and found of my heart, I always find you
attractive, in an edge-of-the-cliff sort of way.

Still you speak of getting your lips pumped up
with collagen, as if they’re tires low on air.

When God was doling out spoonfuls of beauty,
you got more than your share. Blessed with an ass

that makes old men yell out Bingo in the supermarket,
calves that leave marathon runners hunched over

and gasping for air, your nipples poking
from your blouse like the tips of an iceberg

that could sink me. I have to confess, my salacious
little Einstein, sometimes when your head’s

turned, I sneak a peek into your ear, hoping
to snag a glimpse of your medulla oblongata.

Let me fondle your hypothalamus until it gets
wet with thirst, skinny dip in your subconscious,

slow dance with the tornado ripping apart
your psyche, wiggle my tongue inside the hole

where the therapist poured the Krazy Glue
to put your mind back together. Show me

where you keep a man’s breath after taking it away.
Do you stuff it under your mattress, or in the lingerie

drawer, like the wild cousin of potpourri? I’m sick
of making lust with homonyms of you. Let me suckle

your cerebellum. I’ll massage your gray matter
till it glows in the dark, perform brainilingus

till you have acid flashbacks. I won’t solve you
and leave you, or brag to the locker room scholars

about how juicy that vein in your forehead gets
when you multiply big numbers. I don’t want you

just for your quadratic equations. I’ll subtract
the square root of your bosom, from the radius

of our embrace, and conjugate your clitoris
into every verb tense known to humankind.

(((!!GAH!!)))

This one is looooong but oh, so worth it.

Renascence

All I could see from where I stood
Was three long mountains and a wood;
I turned and looked another way,
And saw three islands in a bay.
So with my eyes I traced the line
Of the horizon, thin and fine,
Straight around till I was come
Back to where I’d started from;
And all I saw from where I stood
Was three long mountains and a wood.
Over these things I could not see;
These were the things that bounded me;
And I could touch them with my hand,
Almost, I thought, from where I stand.
And all at once things seemed so small
My breath came short, and scarce at all.
But, sure, the sky is big, I said;
Miles and miles above my head;
So here upon my back I’ll lie
And look my fill into the sky.
And so I looked, and, after all,
The sky was not so very tall.
The sky, I said, must somewhere stop,
And — sure enough! — I see the top!
The sky, I thought, is not so grand;
I ‘most could touch it with my hand!
And reaching up my hand to try,
I screamed to feel it touch the sky.
I screamed, and — lo! — Infinity
Came down and settled over me;
Forced back my scream into my chest,
Bent back my arm upon my breast,
And, pressing of the Undefined
The definition on my mind,
Held up before my eyes a glass
Through which my shrinking sight did pass
Until it seemed I must behold
Immensity made manifold;
Whispered to me a word whose sound
Deafened the air for worlds around,
And brought unmuffled to my ears
The gossiping of friendly spheres,
The creaking of the tented sky,
The ticking of Eternity.
I saw and heard, and knew at last
The How and Why of all things, past,
And present, and forevermore.
The Universe, cleft to the core,
Lay open to my probing sense
That, sick’ning, I would fain pluck thence
But could not, — nay! But needs must suck
At the great wound, and could not pluck
My lips away till I had drawn
All venom out. — Ah, fearful pawn!
For my omniscience paid I toll
In infinite remorse of soul.
All sin was of my sinning, all
Atoning mine, and mine the gall
Of all regret. Mine was the weight
Of every brooded wrong, the hate
That stood behind each envious thrust,
Mine every greed, mine every lust.
And all the while for every grief,
Each suffering, I craved relief
With individual desire, —
Craved all in vain!  And felt fierce fire
About a thousand people crawl;
Perished with each, — then mourned for all!
A man was starving in Capri;
He moved his eyes and looked at me;
I felt his gaze, I heard his moan,
And knew his hunger as my own.
I saw at sea a great fog bank
Between two ships that struck and sank;
A thousand screams the heavens smote;
And every scream tore through my throat.
No hurt I did not feel, no death
That was not mine; mine each last breath
That, crying, met an answering cry
From the compassion that was I.
All suffering mine, and mine its rod;
Mine, pity like the pity of God.
Ah, awful weight!  Infinity
Pressed down upon the finite Me!
My anguished spirit, like a bird,
Beating against my lips I heard;
Yet lay the weight so close about
There was no room for it without.
And so beneath the weight lay I
And suffered death, but could not die.

Long had I lain thus, craving death,
When quietly the earth beneath
Gave way, and inch by inch, so great
At last had grown the crushing weight,
Into the earth I sank till I
Full six feet under ground did lie,
And sank no more, — there is no weight
Can follow here, however great.
From off my breast I felt it roll,
And as it went my tortured soul
Burst forth and fled in such a gust
That all about me swirled the dust.

Deep in the earth I rested now;
Cool is its hand upon the brow
And soft its breast beneath the head
Of one who is so gladly dead.
And all at once, and over all
The pitying rain began to fall;
I lay and heard each pattering hoof
Upon my lowly, thatched roof,
And seemed to love the sound far more
Than ever I had done before.
For rain it hath a friendly sound
To one who’s six feet underground;
And scarce the friendly voice or face:
A grave is such a quiet place.

The rain, I said, is kind to come
And speak to me in my new home.
I would I were alive again
To kiss the fingers of the rain,
To drink into my eyes the shine
Of every slanting silver line,
To catch the freshened, fragrant breeze
From drenched and dripping apple-trees.
For soon the shower will be done,
And then the broad face of the sun
Will laugh above the rain-soaked earth
Until the world with answering mirth
Shakes joyously, and each round drop
Rolls, twinkling, from its grass-blade top.
How can I bear it; buried here,
While overhead the sky grows clear
And blue again after the storm?
O, multi-colored, multiform,
Beloved beauty over me,
That I shall never, never see
Again!  Spring-silver, autumn-gold,
That I shall never more behold!
Sleeping your myriad magics through,
Close-sepulchred away from you!
O God, I cried, give me new birth,
And put me back upon the earth!
Upset each cloud’s gigantic gourd
And let the heavy rain, down-poured
In one big torrent, set me free,
Washing my grave away from me!

I ceased; and through the breathless hush
That answered me, the far-off rush
Of herald wings came whispering
Like music down the vibrant string
Of my ascending prayer, and — crash!
Before the wild wind’s whistling lash
The startled storm-clouds reared on high
And plunged in terror down the sky,
And the big rain in one black wave
Fell from the sky and struck my grave.
I know not how such things can be;
I only know there came to me
A fragrance such as never clings
To aught save happy living things;
A sound as of some joyous elf
Singing sweet songs to please himself,
And, through and over everything,
A sense of glad awakening.
The grass, a-tiptoe at my ear,
Whispering to me I could hear;
I felt the rain’s cool finger-tips
Brushed tenderly across my lips,
Laid gently on my sealed sight,
And all at once the heavy night
Fell from my eyes and I could see, —
A drenched and dripping apple-tree,
A last long line of silver rain,
A sky grown clear and blue again.
And as I looked a quickening gust
Of wind blew up to me and thrust
Into my face a miracle
Of orchard-breath, and with the smell, —
I know not how such things can be! —
I breathed my soul back into me.
Ah!  Up then from the ground sprang I
And hailed the earth with such a cry
As is not heard save from a man
Who has been dead, and lives again.
About the trees my arms I wound;
Like one gone mad I hugged the ground;
I raised my quivering arms on high;
I laughed and laughed into the sky,
Till at my throat a strangling sob
Caught fiercely, and a great heart-throb
Sent instant tears into my eyes;
O God, I cried, no dark disguise
Can e’er hereafter hide from me
Thy radiant identity!
Thou canst not move across the grass
But my quick eyes will see Thee pass,
Nor speak, however silently,
But my hushed voice will answer Thee.
I know the path that tells Thy way
Through the cool eve of every day;
God, I can push the grass apart
And lay my finger on Thy heart!

The world stands out on either side
No wider than the heart is wide;
Above the world is stretched the sky, —
No higher than the soul is high.
The heart can push the sea and land
Farther away on either hand;
The soul can split the sky in two,
And let the face of God shine through.
But East and West will pinch the heart
That can not keep them pushed apart;
And he whose soul is flat — the sky
Will cave in on him by and by.

Arthur Rackham was a turn of the 20th century book illustrator.  Some of his more popular works include the fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm, Wagner’s “The Ring”, “Gulliver’s Travels”, and “Alice in Wonderland”. 

Book illustration is a lost art.  I’m always blown away when each illustration looks like a painting that could be hanging on a museum wall.  These are so expressive and the colors somehow remind me of my childhood in Odessa (Ukraine) where memories, like photographs, take on a vintage hue.

Along the sun-drenched roadside

Along the sun-drenched roadside, from the great
hollow half-tree trunk, which for generations
has been a trough, renewing in itself
an inch or two of rain, I satisfy
my thirst: taking the water’s pristine coolness
into my whole body through my wrists.
Drinking would be too powerful, too clear;
but this unhurried gesture of restraint
fills my whole consciousness with shining water.

Thus, if you came, I could be satisfied
to let my hand rest lightly, for a moment,
lightly, upon your shoulder or your breast.

Put out my eyes

Put out my eyes, and I can see you still,
Slam my ears to, and I can hear you yet;
And without any feet can go to you;
And tongueless, I can conjure you at will.
Break off my arms, I shall take hold of you
And grasp you with my heart as with a hand;
Arrest my heart, my brain will beat as true;
And if you set this brain of mine afire,
Then on my blood-stream I yet will carry you.

Lady at a Mirror

As in sleeping-drink spices
softly she loosens in the liquid-clear
mirror her fatigued demeanor;
and she puts her smile deep inside.

And she waits while the liquid
rises from it; then she pours her hair
into the mirror, and, lifting one
wondrous shoulder from the evening gown,

she drinks quietly from her image. She drinks
what a lover would drink feeling dazed,
searching it, full of mistrust; and she only

beckons to her maid when at the bottom
of her mirror she finds candles, wardrobes,
and the cloudy dregs of a late hour.

These simple synth sounds with her bizarrely beautiful voice make for an addictive combination, not to mention the fascinating video…
Love this.

My dear friend Kristine reminded me of Richard Brautigan, a beat poet I’ve been meaning to check out for a long time.  I was inspired to look this morning and sure enough, I’m in love.  Here are three of my favorites… so far:

Deer Tracks

Beautiful, sobbing
high-geared fucking
and then to lie silently
like deer tracks in the
freshly-fallen snow beside
the one you love.
That’s all

Gee, You’re So Beautiful That It’s Starting To Rain

Oh, Marcia,
I want your long blonde beauty
to be taught in high school,
so kids will learn that God
lives like music in the skin
and sounds like a sunshine harpsichord.
I want high school report cards
to look like this:

Playing with Gentle Glass Things
A

Computer Magic
A

Writing Letters to Those You Love
A

Finding out about Fish
A

Marcia’s Long Blonde Beauty
A+!

I Live In The Twentieth Century

I live in the Twentieth Century
and you lie here beside me. You
were unhappy when you fell asleep.
There was nothing I could do about
it. I felt hopeless. Your face
is so beautiful that I cannot stop
to describe it, and there’s nothing
I can do to make you happy while
you sleep.

1
you came back to the night,
a cluster of shadowy hours;
break it off, eat the fruit of darkness,
taste ignorance.

2
With the pride of a tree
standing in a whirlwind
you undress
moving like water
leaping from the rocks
you abandon your bodies
with the sleepwalking steps of the wind
and throwing yourself on the bed
with eyes closed
you search for your ancient nakedness

3
i fall in you with the blind fall of a wave
your body sustains me like a wave reborn
wind blows outside and gathers the waters
all of the forests are a single tree

the city sails in the middle of the night
through endless earth and sky and seas
the elements entwine and weave
the clothes for an unknown day

4
enormous desert and secret fountain
scale of silence and tree of screams
body that unfolds like a sail
body that enfolds like an ember
heart i tear out from the night
scorpion fixed to my chest
seal of blood on my years as a man

5
(what you say i make)

with a Yes
the lamp guides you to the door of the dream
with a No
the scale that weighs the lies and truth of desire
with an Oh
the flowering one to cross through death

6
(today, always today)

you speak (many rains are heard)
i don’t know what you are saying (a yellow hand holds us)
you keep still (many birds are born)
i don’t know where we are (a scarlet cavity encloses us)
you laugh (the legs of the river are covered with leaves)
i don’t know where we’re going (tomorrow is today in the
middle of the night)

today opens and closes
never moves and never stops
a heart that never flickers out
today (a bird rests
on a tower of hail)
it is always noon

Franz von Stuck (1863-1928) was a German symbolist painter and sculptor that lived and taught in Munich. He was known for his erotic representation of Greek myth. 

Sisyphus

 

 Below (Sin) is his most well-known work: 

Sin

 

Circe

 

Kiss of the Sphinx

 

Music

 

Symbolism flourished out of a darker side of the romantic movement and generally represented dream or idealistic worlds.  Rather than using common human symbols/icons, artists used more personal symbolism as a means to self-expression.  According to Jean Moréas (author of the Symbolist Manifesto), the goal of symbolism was “to express the Ideal” through indirect metaphor: “In this art, scenes from nature, human activities, and all other real world phenomena will not be described for their own sake; here, they are perceptible surfaces created to represent their esoteric affinities with the primordial Ideals.”

Musings

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